“Writing a coherent piece of fiction is like trying to assemble a puzzle with your eyes shut.”
-Me
There you are, toiling away on your story, your manuscript, your magnum opus. It's one of those rare times when the words pour effortlessly forth from your sparkling synapses, rush through your clacking keys and burst upon the page like fireworks made of 100% pure awesomeness.
It's beautiful!
It's brilliant!
It's absolutely out of keeping with everything else in your story.
I hate it when that happens. Not that what you've written so far is bad, it's just... well, not like this. While both parts may be incredible, they’re incredible in completely different and incompatible ways. For some reason, this new, brilliant thing just doesn't fit with the rest of your story.
“What are you talking about?” you say. “My characters are there. It’s the same setting. How could it not fit with the rest?”
Funny you should ask. There are many ways, actually.
-One of your characters isn't acting like themselves. It’s all well and good for your heartless villain to have a softer, more human side, but that has to be established early on and carried through the story. But having Lord Moldyvort’s secret love of puppies pop up out of nowhere and then vanish from the story forever just makes it seem random and out of character.
-You stopped a little too long to let your readers smell the roses. After hundreds of pages of simple descriptive passages, you focused overlong on the décor of one room or the rise and fall of a single landscape, stalling your story’s progress.
-You've added a shiny new character that dazzles, but has no other part to play in the rest of the piece. ‘Nuff said.
-Your dialogue has gotten away from you. We’re all influenced by pop culture and inspired by what entertains us, but your whole cast of 19th century London street-sweepers shouldn’t suddenly start riffing modern one-liners; no matter how cool it was on TV last night.
-Or maybe you don’t know exactly what’s wrong with your new, perfect passage, you just know that it is completely and utterly wrong. Again, ‘nuff said.
We've all done it. We've all created that bit of prose that rocks us back on our heels, proof positive of our brilliant wordsmithery, and yet does absolutely nothing for the story. And worse, sticks out like a sore (if pretty) literary thumb.
But what to do?
It’s simple, but you won’t like it. In such a situation, you must be absolutely, utterly ruthless. You must, as a friend of mine is fond of saying, “Kill your darlings”.
If your beautifully crafted words are only showing off their perfection while leaving the rest of your piece to do the heavy lifting, then they are nothing more than a pointless distraction. Moreover, to leave that pointless distraction in, just because it’s so darn good, is self-conscious and self-congratulatory. It’s showing off for the sake of showing off, story integrity be hanged. Or it’s showing off out of a secret fear that you might not ever write anything so clever again and, gosh darn it, somebody should know that you did it at least once! Again, story integrity be hanged.
If your sentence, paragraph or (God help you) entire chapter or sub plot adds nothing to the structure of your story, if it does nothing to move the narrative along, if it displays your characters acting in ways contrary to their already established natures, then there's nothing else to be done. It has to go.
“But how can I doooo thaaaat?” you cry.
Well, the short answer is a simple formula: select, ctrl + “x” = ruthlessness.
No, really, it’s that easy. And it’s necessary. This is one of those moments that separate the serious writers from the dabblers. While we all write for an anticipated audience (even if it’s ourselves alone) the main reason we write is in service of the story itself. And leaving brilliant bits of distracting flotsam in our stories doesn’t serve them. It’s unfair: unfair to that hypothetical audience and unfair to the story that just wants to be told as only we can tell it.
So be ruthless! Gut that pretty passage like a fish and toss it on the scrap heap!* Your story will be better for it.
*Or, you know, into that quiet little folder that contains all those other pretty, pointless passages you’ve cut from other stories along the way. Because hey, they really are just so gosh darn good and you never know when you might finally have a place for them.
Yes, here at Uncle Mugsy's, you can get a mount to take you all across the Spiral, but at rates so low, you'll think we've slipped a gear! Forget those smooth riding, attractive mounts that force you to earn your gold just to buy them! For a mere 500g down and 50g per week* you can bounce out of our showroom on the luxurious new Torsion Spring 3000!TM Just imagine the jealousy on your friends' faces as you hop by! The wind in your hair! The sun on your face! The crick in your spine! And all for a song** Who needs a flappin' dragon or a prancin' pony when you can have one of these babies?
This just in from the wizards at KingsIsle:
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